Why Me?
by WolfHeaart
Summary: Matthew Williams, also know as Canada, finds himself spending more and more time with Gilbert Beilschmidt, the dissolved nation of Prussia, but why? (PruCan) Humans names used. Cover image does not belong to me. Rated T for mild language, alcohol, blood, and because I'm overly cautious
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey guys, this is my first fanfic on this site /causally faints I hope you like it and don't forget to review! Please inform me if anyone is being ooc or how I can improve my work! I'm sorry if this first chapter is really boring, it will get more "intense"later on. Thanks for reading! **

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_Knock_

_Knock._

Pause.

_Knock knock knock._

Matthew Williams frowned at the annoying knocking. Not only was he unused to getting visitors, but he had just sat down by a recently lit fire. Today was one of his only days he got off from work and Matthew had planned to spend the evening snuggled on the couch, a plate of pancakes beside him, listening to the fire crackle and reading a book.

_Knock Knock Knock_

_Just ignore it_, the blonde Canadian thought, _probably just some salesman, he'll go away soon_. However, much to Matthew's disappointment, the knocking did not cease. After about five minutes of loud, obnoxious banging on his door, Matthew gave up. Letting out an exasperated sigh, he cracked open the door. As soon as he saw who it was, though, Matthew slammed the door shut.

"Awww c'mon Matt! You can't do this to your own brother!"

"Go home Alfred, I'm not in the mood to hang out," Matthew shouted, leaning his back against the door.

He was definitely not up for his twin's shenanigans. Last time he had hung out with Alfred, Matthew ended up running into a friend who mistook him for Alfred and just nearly avoided a trip to the hospital.

"Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaattttttttttttttttttttttttt," Alfred whined,"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaassssse."

"I wonder why I'm not inviting you in," Matthew sarcastically muttered.

"Pleaaaase, Mattie, let me in! It's freezing out here," Alfred begged from behind the door.

As much as he would enjoy having his brother freeze to death at the moment, Matthew opened the door. The Canadian instantly regretted doing so as he was attacked by a huge bear hug.

"I knew you'd come through!" his twin squealed.

Matthew sighed and, with much effort, pried his brother off of him.

"So what brings you here?" Matthew asked unenthusiastically._ I have pancakes to eat!_

"Oh yeah! I've got something for you!" Alfred rummaged through a bag and brought out a pristine white envelope. On front of said envelope was Matthew's name written is swirly calligraphy. The American grinned at his brother.

"France accidentally sent me yours too."

Matthew blinked in surprise. The nations did not often send letters to each other; they would text or use email. Must be pretty important, it looks pretty special. Matthew turned the envelope over in his hands.

"What is it?"

"A super secret spy mission!"

Alfred grinned and began laughing as Matthew's face twisted from confusion, to disbelief, to the scowl that he was wearing earlier.

"Seriously."

"You're so gullible Matt."

The Canadian sighed and began picking at the letter's red wax seal. _It was like Britain wrote this...who makes wax seals?_

"It's an invitation to a party Francis is throwing after the next world meeting!" the American said, grabbing the invitation from his brother's hands and unceremoniously ripped open the envelope.

Alfred threw the letter like a ninja star to Matthew's face, who was hit in the head with a corner.

"Ow. Throw it softer next time."

"Ha, like France? No way!"

Matthew rolled his eyes and removed the invitation from the envelope.

_"You're Invited"_

Matthew rolled his eyes again, this time at the fancy font his father figure used to type the letter in. The Canadian looked over the letter a few times, scanning for anything suspicious. He was well aware of some of the the more undesirable parties Francis hosted and did not want to risk it.

"Doesn't sound fun?" Alfred asked.

The Canadian shrugged. From what it looked like, Francis was turning his mansion into a nightclub. Alcohol and dancing didn't really sound like a good time to Matthew.

"Meh, not really."

"What?! C'mon Matt, you never have any fun."

Matthew crossed his arms and pouted, "Well it isn't like anyone besides you wants to hang out with me."

Alfred frowned and racked his brain for people that actually remembered Canada.

"What about Cuba?"

Canada sighed, "He's ok when he's not mistaking me for you and trying to beat the crap out of me."

"Oh, ummm," America searched his mind for more people. "Haven't you hung out with Prussia a few times?"

Matthew buried his face in his hands. "Him crashing over here nearly every time his brother kicks him out doesn't really count as hanging out."

America blinked, "What?"

_Crap! I hadn't told him about that yet_, Canada mentally punched himself. "Oh y-yeah did I n-not tell you that? M-must of slipped my mind, eh?"

"What?" America repeated, louder this time. Alfred did not get angry often, but when suspicious figures began hanging out with his brother behind his back, Alfred's protective brother instincts began to kick in. Full force.

The Canadian stared at his brother, terrified. He wasn't scared for himself, Alfred would never hurt him. He was scared for Prussia. Gilbert enjoyed popping in at Matthew's place at the most insane hours, beg for pancakes, and usually end up falling asleep on Matthew's couch. Although Canada didn't really consider that hanging out, he knew Alfred would probably bicycle kick Gilbert in the face for even wanting Matthew to make him pancakes.

To Matthew's surprise, Alfred just sat and the floor and clenched and unclenched his fists. After about a full minute of silence, he seemed to have calmed down.

"So how long has this idiot been coming over?" Alfred questioned, venom in his voice.

Canada thought for a moment before answering, "About seven months now."

Alfred was visibly straining not to punch a wall, "How could he, umm, y'know…."

"See me?"

"Yeah."

Matthew frowned. This was a question he had asked himself many times. Almost nobody could even see Matthew, so why had the self-proclaimed "most awesome" country even hang out with him?

Unable to really answer, Matthew shrugged. "I don't know," it was more of a question then an answer but at this point, the Canadian just wanted to get out of this awkward conversation. As if some had answered his prayers, Matthew's home phone rang.

"I'll get!" Alfred exclaimed, sprinting over to the phone and grabbing it before Matthew could protest.

"Al it's ok I can-"

"Hello?" Alfred said into the speaker. There was a long silence on the end of the line.

"America?" a German voice asked. There was some bickering in the background of the phone. "I'm sorry I must have dialed the wrong number, I swore I called….." he trailed off. Alfred heard a voice shout "Canada!" in the background.

"Oh yeah you did, let me put him on." America practically threw the phone to his brother, who just managed to catch it.

"Hello, this is Matthew," Canada said in a quiet voice.

Now that the American couldn't hear, he watched his brother's facial expression for any sign of what he and Germany were talking about. At the moment, Matthew was wearing a look of concern, but after nodding and saying "Mmmhm" a few times, it turned into a fond smile. The person on the other line said something and Matthew went bright red with blush.

"Oh no not at all!" he said into the phone. "It isn't anything like that! Yes, yes ok bye." Matthew put down the phone, still red.

"Umm, Matt."

"Yeah?"

"You look like a tomato."

Matthew looked away and went to the kitchen to splash some water on his heated face. Alfred followed him and raided his fridge.

"What was that ab- never mind!" the American knew to shut up when his brother gave him an icy glare. There was a long silence as Alfred dug through his brother's fridge. "You still never really answered my question though," Alfred said when he emerged from the fridge with a large tub of ice cream. America began scavenging through a drawer to find a spoon.

"I told you: I don't know why he notices me, he just does."

Alfred triumphantly held the spoon up in the air once he had found it and started helping himself to the ice cream. Between mouthfuls of ice cream he said, "The guy's a creep; I wouldn't hang out that much with him if I were you."

"I don't really have a choice," Canada mumbled, "he just pops in without notice."

Alfred frowned; creepy perverts like Prussia had no reason to stay with his innocent brother whenever they felt like it. "Just don't think he's more awesome than me."

Matthew smiled and giggled, glad his brother wasn't too mad about hanging out with Prussia behind his back. "Oh course not Al."

At that moment, "The Star-Spangled Banner" blared loudly through the room: the American's cell phone was ringing. He took his iPhone out of his pocket and moaned unhappily when he saw the number. Matthew rolled his eyes at his brother; this always happened when someone important called, usually his boss. Alfred gave Matthew a pleading look, trying to ignore the loud anthem.

"Answer it," Canada ordered. Alfred sighed and answered it.

"Yes, yes, yes. Yeah I know! Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeee," Alfred hung up the phone. "Sorry Matt, I hafta go. My boss wants me to finish the stack of paperwork on my desk."

The Canadian nodded, glad his brother was finally going._ I can return to my pancakes!_

"See ya later!" Alfred shouted from the front door.

"See ya!" Matthew replied and sat back down on the couch. By now the fire was dying and the pancakes were cold, but only one thing was on the Canadian's mind.

_Why does Gilbert notice me?_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Yay, chapter 2! ^u^**

**Warning: There is some gore in this chapter (just blood)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia or any of the characters.**

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Matthew awoke to the sound of a phone ringing. It wasn't like he was really sleeping though, even if it was two in the morning. He couldn't sleep with _that_ question on his mind. So instead, he lied on his bed for hours just thinking about why.

_Why?_

"Hello, Matthew speaking," the Canadian answer the phone with a yawn and a frown.

"_Mattie! Just the person I wanted to talk to!_" a cheerful German voice said on the other line.

"Oh hey Gil," Matthew smiled fondly. "You do know it's three in the morning here, right?"

"_Oh really? It's about eight o'clock over here._"

The Canadian sighed and shook his head, "So what do you want?

"_Well remember last night how you said you could be the designated driver for me and my brother and his boy-toy?_"

Matthew nodded, remembering the awkward phone call. "Yeah I do, what about it?"

"_I just really wanted to apologize for my bruder being such an arschloch and forgetting your name._"

A warm feeling crept into his heart. Matthew couldn't remember Gilbert ever apologizing for something, especially if it wasn't something he did. "O-oh its okay. It happens all the time."

The Canadian could hear his friend snort on the other line. "_It really shouldn't though, I mean, its pretty hard to forget a cute face like yours. I don't understand how someone could mistake the awesome you for your unawesome brother. You guys look nothing alike!_"

Matthew began blushing as he realized that Gilbert just called him cute. "Thanks Gil, that means a lot."

"_Kesesese, no problem, Birdie! You should hang out with the awesome me more, that'll make you really stick out!_"

The blush grew darker._ Of all nicknames why does he call me that_? They continued talking about Francis' party and the world meeting coming up. Gilbert made the occasional joke and Matthew either laughed harder than necessary or rolled his eyes. The conversation lasted for awhile, until Matthew yawned again.

"_Oh scheisse, I forgot it's really early over there! You should have reminded me,_" Gilbert said, remembering the time.

"Oh its okay, I forgot too," Matthew turned to his clock, _4:23_. "Time flies when you're having fun, eh."

Gilbert laughed, "_Get some sleep Matt. I talk to you later._"

"Mmmk," Matthew mumbled, already dozing off. "G'Night, Gil."

"_Night, Birdie._"

* * *

The air was steamy and hot. A bright burning sun beat down upon Matthew's back. The air was still despite the moving steam and it was eerily quiet. The boy frowned, unable to see a thing in the unnatural light and not exactly remembering where he was. Steam swirled around him and clouded his glasses.

"_Matt! What took you so long?_" a static-filled voice called out. Matthew tried to reply, but found his voice seemed to be silent. "_Mattie, I've been waiting forever!_"

_Was I meeting someone here?_

Canada looked around, trying to identify the voice. Turning all around, Matthew could see nothing; nothing but steamy air drifting around. He tried cleaning his glasses but they always would fog up again. Matthew attempted to call out back to the disembodied voice: he moved his mouth, but no words came out. All of the sudden, Matthew felt the presence of something behind him. A body pushed against his back and a hand snaked up his loose shirt.

"_You shouldn't have kept me waiting. You know you impatient I get_," the voice purred, from behind the blonde boy. The figure's breath tickled Matthew's ear and the cool hand pressed lightly against his chest, right above his heart. The hand began tracing a shape over Matthew's chest. His heart began beating faster and a warm feeling lingered wherever the hand touched him. Matthew couldn't help but shiver.

"_Are you cold, Mattie?_" the voice whispered. It was so full of static that Matthew could hardly understand what it was saying.

The Canadian tried to answer, but remembered he had lost his voice. After tracing the same shape a few times by his heart, the hand slipped out from under his shirt, and Matthew found himself strangely colder than before.

The steam suddenly began swirling faster around Matthew, making the nation dizzy. The nation realized just how hot it was and began finding it hard to breathe. It was like someone had blocked his lungs off from the rest of his body.

_What's going on?_

"_You never answered me, Matt,_" the voice hissed, as if it was angry.

Matthew's mouth couldn't form any words. He was trying and failing to breathe, making choking sounds instead. The swirling steam and boiling heat made Matthew feel faint and sick. Without notice, the temperature suddenly dropped to extreme colds. The steam turned to pale snow and sharp shards of hail began to fall. Matthew went from feeling overheated to freezing cold. Frost nipped at his nose and small bits of hail lodged themselves into his skin. The nation's stomach lurched from the sudden change in temperature and he felt even more sick than before.

Then a searing pain shot through the Canadian's chest, right where the hand had been tracing over a few seconds ago. The fierce pain started from Matthew's chest and traveled through his body, stretching from his toes to his ears and making the life quickly seep of of the blonde boy. Matthew looked down and nearly threw up: there was a blade right in his chest and he could see where the snow had been stained red. He couldn't make sense of why it was there, his mind was too clouded by dizziness and pain. Matthew tried to breath again, but ended up inhaling blood.

_What is happening?_

Canada could only collapse onto the ground and watch as a dark crimson spread across the pure white.

"_You know how impatient I can get, Birdie_."

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**A/N: Wowowow this was actually really fun to write. I don't really have any other notes other than thank you so much for favoriting, following, or reviewing! It means so much to me TTuTT**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Wow this chapter is... interesting. I wrote most of it while listening to sad music or right after I finished watching Attack on Titan. ;u; Thanks for all the review, favorites, follows, EVERYTHING! **

**I now present you Chapter 3 (AKA the chapter where Matthew is really depressed)!**

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Matthew awoke the second time that day screaming. After a good 15 seconds, he sat up and panted, memories of the dream flooding back to him.

_What the hell was that about?_

The Canadian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. After a few more deep breaths, Matthew felt a little bit calmer but still extremely on edge at the same time. He tried to ignore the lingering memories of the nightmare and walked out of his bedroom to the kitchen.

_I'll make some pancakes, that'll probably help._

Matthew got out a mixer and set it down on the kitchen counter, trying his best to focus on the task at hand.

_2 cups of flour, pinch of salt, 1/4 cup of buttermilk..._

_What was Prussia doing in that dream? Why would he...?_ Stop it Matthew, focus.

_Beat the eggs and mix mix mix..._

Maybe it was an omen?_ I remember Spain talking about how people could have dreams with hidden meanings._

Canada, who was no longer focused, spilled the contents of his red and white maple leaf bowl onto the kitchen table.

"Merde!" Matthew cursed. He glared at the batter spreading across the floor, as if that would clean it up and somehow magically suck the raw pancakes-to-be back into the bowl. The batter just continued making sloppy designs on the ground. Matthew just let the cold batter spread across the kitchen floor.

_Why do I not want to clean this up?_

The blonde just stared at the mess on the floor, spacing out.

_Why?_

Canada just stood there as still as a statue, his mind began to drift from the disaster in front of him to the question that had been haunting him since the day before.

_Why does Prussia notice me? Did my dream have anything to do with that question?_

Matthew froze, as a horrible thought had crossed his mind.

_Maybe that dream was a message from the future. Maybe it meant that Gilbert's going to leave me._ A sharp,sinking feeling filled Matthew's stomach.

_I wouldn't blame him, I'm not that exciting. Like a puddle of batter. A bother._

Suddenly, Matthew felt his eyes sting and they filled with tears.

_It's not like I'm his only friend. He can easily just replace me, make a new batch of batter._

The Canadian sat down in the batter that had spread and touched his bare feet. He buried his head in his knees.

_Make more pancakes... get new friends._

Matthew stared down at the soupy batter pooling beneath him. A small drop of water-no, a tear, fell down and caused the raw to-be-pancakes to ripple.

_Why I am so sad about this?_

The blonde felt more tears slide down his face. Matthew laughed cruelly, _I'm like a 13 year-old crying about a rejection. What is wrong with me? _Silent tears began falling down the nation's face. He clutched his head with his hands, confused and angry.

_What is making me so upset over this dream?_

Matthew knew that it wasn't just the dream he was crying about. He knew he was crying about the fact that Prussia was really his only real friend. He was crying because he knew that if Prussia wanted to, he could just leave Matthew and be completely unaffected.

_Gilbert doesn't need me like I need him._

Living with only about four people who actually remember your name is hard. It's even harder when two out of four said people sometimes forget your name and when three out of said four people live across a huge freaking ocean. Losing, or having thoughts of losing, one of these people is traumatizing, especially for someone as fragile as Matthew. He needed every one of the people who knew him to help build up the meager amount of self-confidence he had.

_I'm a mess_, Canada thought, looking down at the pale pancake batter that was seeping into his clothes. The blonde boy took a shaky breath before attempting to get up. However, Matthew managed to slip on the spilled batter and came crashing down, hitting his head on the kitchen counter, and knocking himself out.

* * *

Matthew Williams stared blankly at boy in front of him.

_Isn't that….me? What am I doing here? Is this a dream?_

Canada looked around at his surroundings. It appeared he was in a park that was oddly familiar. Tall oak trees contained small children playing in them. Even more kids were climbing, crawling, jumping and running around (or in) a play structure. They were all having a great time, enjoying themselves in the cool air.

The boy in front of Matthew appeared to be a slightly younger version of himself. Younger-Matthew was about a centimeter shorter and had longer hair that stopped a little past his shoulders. A stubborn blonde hair curl stuck straight out of his hair, as usual. The boy was wearing a baggy red "Canada" sweatshirt, although it was so faded, not many people could read the words. He had an upset frown and his eyebrows were furrowed, as if he was thinking hard about something.

"Took you long enough!" the younger Canada shouted randomly after Matthew had stared him down for a few seconds.

"Wh-wha-" Matthew was interrupted by his younger self _walking through_ him. Matthew turned around to see that the younger him had been unaffected, and was walking over to a familiar figure, normally if not a tad bit angry.

"Sorry, Birdie! West was lecturing me on 'the importance of coming back when you say you will,'" Younger-Matthew's friend complained crossing his arms.

_This scene is familiar_. Matthew smiled fondly,_ The "awesome" nation of Prussia, late as always._

"For forty-eight minutes, Gil?" the younger blonde asked. He looked a considerably more ticked off now.

"Ja, he would've go on for hours if you hadn't texted me!"

_Wait a minute, I remember this._

Matthew was struck with realization. _This a memory._

_This is a dream, it has to be._

The Canadian could only gawk at the younger dream-nations as they walked away from the park towards an ice-cream truck. Matthew knew exactly what would happen next.

_I'm going to trip._

Sure enough, younger-Matthew stumbled over a small uplift in the sidewalk. Dream-Gilbert caught the blonde before he could plummet into the sidewalk. After some awkward laughter, the duo continued walking away from the park.

_This is lunacy._

Having nothing better to do, Matthew decided to follow his dream self. A nagging feeling grew in his stomach.

_I'm really going to regret this._


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Re-reading the outline I have for this story, I think I should rename it "The Story in Which Matthew has Weird Dreams and Cries a lot over His Problems" XD That's pretty much all that's been happening so far, but *hopefully* I can incorporate some romance in the next chapter.**

**I hope you enjoy Chapter 4!**

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"What do you mean you don't have any more ice cream? You are in a freaking ice cream truck."

"Look kid, we are out of ice cream. Some group of little brats just bought the whole truck, so scram!" the irritated ice cream vendor snarled at the stubborn little albino jerk who apparently didn't understand what "go away" meant. The albino's blonde buddy just smiled sadly and dragged his friend away by the sleeve of his jacket.

"C'mon Gil, let's just go." There was definitely some disappointment in the boy's voice. The albino gave the ice cream vendor the finger and let his blonde friend drag him away.

_This is so stupid, _Matthew thought._ I'm reliving probably one of the most embarrassing moments of my life in a dream. There is completely and utterly no point to this._

Matthew watched as his dream-self and dream-Gilbert walked from the ice cream truck to a huge tree full of twelve and thirteen year olds. Dream-Matthew was too busy trying to comfort dream-Gilbert to realize that the kids in the tree started snickering.

"Don't worry about it, Gil. We can get ice cream somewhere else. Isn't there a Frozen Yogurt place just down the street?"

Gilbert cheered up at this and wrapped his arm around his companion. "Y'know Birdie, you're right. we don't need that unawesome ice cream truck ice cream! Hell, we don't even need ice cream!" The German headlocked dream-Matthew and began playfully noogieing him. "'Cause I got you."

Raucous laughter could be heard from two kids above. Matthew buried his head in his hands, _What did I do to deserve reliving this?_

"Get a room!" one of the kids in the trees shouted. The gang of children erupted into loud laughter. Dream-Matthew's face went red when he realized that the kids were talking to him.

"N-no, it's not like that!" the embarrassed Canadian stammered to the giggling children. Dream-Matthew turned to dream-Gilbert as if pleading for help. Dream-Gilbert was just smirking at the younger Matthew.

"What's not like what?"

The younger Matthew turned a shade of red that could rival the color of his flag. "I-it's w-w-we aren't…"

Matthew facepalmed. _Smooth Matt, smooth_.

"C'mon Birdie, what happened to frozen-yogurt?"

The Canadian awkwardly nodded. As if to humor the tree residing children, Gilbert grabbed dream-Matthew's hand and began swinging it back and forth like they were a happy couple.

"G-Gil!"

Matthew smiled, remembering how he was so conscious of his sweaty hands when the German was holding his. When Gilbert's were sweaty as well, Matthew decided to blame it on the heat.

_Looking back on it, it isn't really that hot. Was Gil embarrassed about the incident with the kids too?_

Matthew, now interested in reliving the day, continued following his dream-self to an old Frozen Yogurt shop. He took notes on the behavior of not only his past-self, but of Gilbert as well. The Canadian couldn't help but notice that the younger duo never let go of each other's hand, even though they were long out of sight of the tree dwelling children.

Interesting.

They only let go of each other's hands when they approached the door to the shop. Gilbert opened the door and bowed dramatically.

"After you," Gilbert said with a smirk. Dream-Matthew rolled his eyes and walked into the small shop. Gilbert followed after him and Matthew slipped in through the door, just as it was closing.

* * *

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Dream-Matthew hung out with dream-Gilbert and Matthew mentally took note of strange behavior in both of them. The more Matthew looked at it, the more he realized how much like a couple he and Prussia acted like. When Gilbert had yogurt all over his face, dream-Matthew got a napkin and wiped his friend's face off. When dream-Matthew got a cramp from walking around after eating so much frozen yogurt, dream-Gilbert let him ride on his back all the way to a bench. And then the hand holding….

Gilbert eventually claimed he was thirsty and went off in search of a water fountain, leaving dream-Matthew to sit on the bench alone. Being naturally curious, Matthew decided to follow Gilbert. He knew that his dream-self would just sit there texting his brother about a topic long forgotten. To Matthew's surprise, as soon as dream-Gilbert reached a water fountain, he ducked behind a tree, as if hiding from something. Matthew followed Prussia behind the tree where the German had now pulled out his cell phone.

_He looks really nervous,_ the Canadian thought. _Why would he be so nervous?_

Dream-Gilbert had now began rapidly typing on the small buttons of the cellular device. He looked like he was about to cry now. Very out of character, noted Matthew. Suddenly some strange German tune blared out of the phone.

"I can't do it," Gilbert whispered into the phone. Matthew tilted his head to the side. What's this?

" No! I can't do this to Matt, Francis! I don't know how he'll react, and he'll probably hate me and think I'm totally unawesome."

_Why is he talking about me to Francis? Why would I be angry with him?_ There was a pause, and a look of pure horror crossed Dream-Gilbert's face.

"No...you wouldn't," he whispered, fear edging his tone. There was another pause, Prussia's face now looked strained. "Well no, I don't want to just stay his friend forever."

Matthew's breath hitched._ What? Gilbert didn't- Gil doesn't want to be my friend_. Tears began to sting at Matthew's eyes. After a very long pause, dream-Gilbert sighed.

"Ja, ja I know. I just…..I don't want to hurt him. I get it, okay? You want to know the awesome reason why? Well-"

Matt suddenly felt the ground shake and heard someone shouting his name. A worried voice surrounded him and roared in his ears. Gilbert's explanation was drowned out by the deafening voice

"Matt, Mattie! C'mon wake up!"

And with that, Matthew awoke, eyes blurry and full of tears.

"Thank god you're awake, you hit your head really hard," Alfred sighed. "I tried calling you and you wouldn't answer, so I knew something was wrong. Hey- are you crying?"

_I never got to figure out why Gilbert doesn't like me._

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**A/N: ;u; holy cows thank you so much for all of the nice reviews! I'm sorry the story hasn't been romantic at all, as I said earlier this should all change in the next chapter. Don't forget to R&R!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Wow I'm so sorry this is out a week late! I was EXTREMELY busy with school and Halloween and I procrastinate WAYYYY too much. ^^"**

**Anyways, I'm going to (attempt to) post chapter 6 in the middle of the week as compensation for this chapter being short and posting it so late. Thank you for reviewing and reading. You guys have no idea how overjoyed I am when I get a review! I now present you...**

**Chapter 5!**

* * *

"Holy crap, Matt, what happened?"

Canada couldn't process his brother's words, his brain clogged with only one thought: _Prussia wants to leave me. Prussia wants to leave me. Prussia wants to-_

"Mattie, please talk to me." America sounded worried and, to Matthew's surprise, scared.

_Alfred won't understand. Almost everyone likes him and at least he can be seen by everyone._ Matthew attempted to say something, but it was choked with tears. Instead, he let out a small inhuman cry and shamefully buried his face in his hands. _Wait. Where am I?_

Confused, Matthew looked around at his surroundings. Everything was a little blurry from the tears still falling from his face, but Matthew could just make out some hockey posters and the familiar furniture in his room. The Canadian felt the same comfort of his bed and softness of the fleece sheets. _Strange, I don't remember going to bed._ Exhaustion suddenly attacked the blonde's body and his head throbbed. A small, pained, whined escaped Matthew's lips.

"Matthew, Mattie please answer me. You're really freaking me out. You didn't lose your memory did you? That would suck so much!"

_Let me rest in peace, Al, I'm too tired for this._

Alfred's chatter only worsened Matthew's forming headache. By now his whole head was pounding, but thankfully the tears had stopped. Matthew took a few shaky breaths before attempting to talk again.

"Al shut up, I'm fine," was all he was able to say. Whenever Matthew moved his mouth, a stream of pain would stab his head. His brother let out a sigh of relief.

"You obviously aren't fine. I tried calling you and you wouldn't pick up and so I knew something was wrong. I came over here as fast as I could and found you passed out on your kitchen floor surrounded in pancake batter with a huge bruise on your head. Being the hero I am, I got you into your bed and cleaned up the mess you made." Alfred beamed, proud of his work.

Canada winced. Alfred seemed to be louder than usual. _Was he always this talkative?_

"Al, I appreciate everything you've done for me but-" Matthew clutched his throbbing head, "could you um, leave me in peace?"

Alfred seemed to understand his brother's pain, and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Sure man, anything I can do to help my bro." With that, the rambunctious American left Matthew's house, leaving the Canadian with only his thoughts for company.

As much as Matthew wanted to sleep, he couldn't. There was too much to think about and he didn't want to dream in fear it would be creepy or saddening. So, with nothing better to do, Matthew Williams talked to himself.

_So Matthew, what the hell has your life come to?_

_Let's see… economy is good, people are happy, and I've been crying because I had a dream where my best friend left me._

Matthew let out a sigh. _God, what has the world come to? I'm worse than a teenage girl._

_But why would Gil not wanna hang out with me anymore?_

_Well, I'm not the most social butterfly. I'm not assertive or willing to take a risk- hell even if I ever was no one can even see me. Al, Arthur, and Francis might be there, but I doubt it. They're usually too busy with work and… other stuff._

_Stop. You're getting off track, Matt._

_What I want to know is why I remembered that dream so well. Could it be a sign?_

Matthew mentally went over the dream and remembered how much like a couple he and Prussia acted. The Canadian couldn't help but blush at the thought of_ THAT_ ever happening.

_Gil would never have feelings like that towards me, would he_?

_Oh shut up, Matt. You heard him, he doesn't even want to be your friend._

_True, but what if..._

_What if Prussia loved me?_

Matthew slapped himself softly for thinking such things.

_No, no I mustn't think like that. I mean it isn't like I love him…_

But saying that Canada loved Prussia would explain a lot of things; like why the Canadian always felt a warm feeling inside his stomach when he was with the German. It might also explain Matthew's strange dreams and why he had been more emotionally unstable in the last few days than he had been in his entire life.

So maybe Gilbert did love him.

And maybe Matthew loved him back.

* * *

"Holy crap. What am I thinking?" Matthew said aloud. "There is a less than two percent chance that Gilbert would have any feelings for me."

_Still, two percent is something…_

"Matthew Williams _listen_ to yourself. You heard him. He doesn't want to even be your _friend_. you can't just let your feelings blind you," the Canadian spat.

_But Gil is always nice to you, he sees you, and he had never done anything to hurt you…_

"Maybe I misheard him. He might still like me… But if that's the case, why did he say that he might hurt me?"

Matthew clutched his painfully throbbing head. He was just so exhausted and his body ached everywhere.

_Love sucks._

Beside him, Matthew's phone began vibrating.

_Who could that be?_

The Canadian lethargically stretched and grabbed the buzzing device. He had gotten a text.

_From: Gilbert_

_I know this is a bit sudden and strange, but I need to talk to you seriously. I can't do it over phone, so find me at the world meeting._

A cold sensation washed over Matthew. The text was awfully out of character for Prussia.

_This can't be good._

* * *

**EDIT: Sorry I didn't end up posting chapter 6 ^^' This week of all weeks my teachers decided to give me a TON of homework so I was extremely busy. You are just going to have to wait for Saturday for the 6th Chapter**


	6. Chapter 6

_What could it mean?_

Five days had past since Matthew received the mysterious text from Gilbert. It had been the only thing on the blonde Canadian's mind ever since he got it. Matthew had spent hours thinking about Gilbert's text.

_Does he want to confess? Does he want to be honest and tell me our friendship is over? This is just so confusing._

The only time Matthew didn't think of Prussia was when he was with his brother. Alfred had a tendency to put the spotlight on himself, making it impossible to think of anyone else. Since the World Meeting was being held in France, Matthew had to travel by airplane. Luckily for Matthew, Al was sitting next to him the whole airplane ride there, so thoughts of Gilbert didn't pester him for almost eight hours.

Unfortunately for Matthew, the flight seemed to pass quite too quickly. Before he knew it, the Canadian had to haul his tired brother off of the plane. The duo easily found their luggage and, with some difficulty, hailed a cab to take them to the hotel that France had arranged all of the countries stay at. Matthew, being fluent in French as well as English, did all of the talking if someone could see him. Usually Alfred would have to point out that there was a person with him before the citizens could see Matthew, which was a bit sad.

While the taxi drove through the dark streets of night-time Paris, Alfred slept, leaving Matthew alone with his thoughts and the taxi driver. The first thing that came to the Canadian's mind was whether or not Prussia had already arrived at the hotel.

_He probably did, considering how much of a perfectionist his brother is. They probably arrived a whole day earlier than necessary._

Matthew sighed, not very impressed with himself for thinking about him. Thinking about the one who had been on his mind most of the time now was not a surprise anymore.

_If Gilbert does like me, I wonder who's going to confess first. I doubt I will, considering how I'm not very assertive. Maybe Gil will make it easy for me and break off our friendship before I start thinking he does have feelings for me-_

"Est-ce votre arrêt?" the taxi driver asked, interrupting Matthew's thoughts. The nation looked out of the window to see a magnificent building standing brightly against the black background of the night sky. He nodded, paid the driver, and retrieved his snoring brother from the back.

"Merci!" Matthew shouted from the steps of the hotel as the taxi drove off into the dark of Paris.

After about thirty minutes of trying to get the concierge to notice him, Matthew finally raised his voice to be heard over the receptionist's obnoxious humming.

"Excusez-moi?!" Matthew shouted as loud as he could. The concierge looked around as if she had heard something. The Canadian waved his arms in front of her to attract her attention.

"Oh, je ne vous vois pas," the ditzy receptionist apologized.

"It's not like it doesn't happen all the time," the nation sarcastically muttered under his breath.

"You speak English?" the receptionist asked with only a slight accent. She grinned, "English was my first language, I'm actually from Canada."

This caught Matthew's interest, "Really, Canada? Why did you move to France?"

"Well it's a bit of a long story…"

"I've got time," the nation said with a timid smile.

Matthew ended up spending _WAY_ more time than he planned to spend chatting with the receptionist (Canada learned her name was Antoinette) about her past and how she liked Canada. When asked about his past, Matthew lied and said he was a government representative from Canada who was a attending an important meeting in Paris. Matthew was enjoying talking to someone who actually noticed him he hardly realized the time. As Antoinette and Matthew were talking about different types of candies and chocolates, Alfred woke up.

"Wh-wha?" Alfred asked scratching his head. Sleeping on the floor, abandoned, had not been very comfortable.

"The great beast finally awakes from a great slumber," Matthew teased in a deep voice, attempting to impersonate a movie voiceover. To Alfred's surprise, there was a girl laughing at Matthew's comment.

Alfred pointed a finger at Antoinette. "Who's she?" he mouthed.

"A friend." Matthew mouthed back.

The receptionist put her hands on her hips and pouted. "I'm right here you know!"

"Finally someone who speaks English!" America said in a loud, obnoxious voice, causing the concierge to giggle. Alfred gave her what he would call a "signature hero grin and wink."

"So, Mattie, did Francis get us a room on the highest floor?"

Matthew went red, "Ha, well that's a _funny_ story…" He had been so focused on talking with Antoinette he had completely forgotten about getting a room key or even getting his room number. "I've kinda been occupied and…"

"Wow I'm surprised, _I'm_ usually the one who gets off task," Alfred scoffed.

"Mistakes happen, eh?" the Canadian shrugged.

Antoinette smiled. "I'm guessing you are Mr. Jones and Mr. Williams? Those are the names the only reserved room left is under."

The twins nodded simultaneously and the receptionist blinked as if she was confused. Then a huge smile spread across her face, "You guys are twins! How could I not notice that? Another pair of twins came in today, they seemed Italian..."

Alfred and Matthew grinned knowingly. "I think we might know them," Matthew said.

Antoinette handed Alfred the key and, to Matthew's disappointment, the twins were situated in a room on the top floor. Leaning forward, Antoinette whispered in a cautious tone, "Be careful, the people in the room next to you seemed like the 'party-type.' Some overly happy Spaniard and a creepy albino got it I believe."

Matthew froze: he had completely forgotten about Gilbert.

Alfred had already began walking off, "Thanks for the warning, Annie! See you tomorrow~!"

"Adieu!" Antoinette waved.

Matthew trailed behind Alfred, not able to say anything.

_Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god. What am I even going to say to Prussia? It's going to be so awkward- he's going to break off our friendship and I'm going to be so lost without him and he's going to hate me forever and and-_

"What do you think, Mattie? Matt! Are you off in 'La La Land' again?"

"Wha-Wha- No just repeat the question."

"I was saying that Annie's pretty hot, don't 'cha think?" Alfred smirked as the duo began to approach the elevator. On the metal doors, an "Out of Order" sign was placed.

"What!? No! I mean- well- she's pretty but-" the Canadian's face turned the color of a beet.

"Ooooh, you've got the hots for her!" Alfred taunted. He quickly began his ascent up the hotel stairs, skipping every other step.

"I do not!" Matthew screeched and chased his brother upward. The American continued to tease and his twin ran up the stairs, denying anything that Alfred said. By the sixth flight of steps, Matthew was out of breath.

"Al _-wheeze-_ wait up," Matthew gasped. His brother chuckled._ How is he still breathing?_

"C'mon, lover-boy, only a few more steps!"

"Sh-shut up!" Matthew crawled up the last stairs and collapsed in a heaving mess. "I will _-wheeze-_ never do _-wheeze-_ that again."

Alfred helped his brother up and practically dragged the panting Canadian to their hotel room. Matthew didn't spend any time admiring the nice spacious room and went straight toward the large, queen sized bed. He fell into it's soft sheets and passed out right on the spot, mentally and physically exhausted.

"Sweet dreams, Matt," Alfred mumbled, tousling his sleeping brother's hair.

And for a change, Matthew slept a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

* * *

**Translations (French to English) I apologize if these are wrong, blame Google Translate and my inability to learn a foreign language.**

**Est-ce votre arrêt? - Is this your stop?**

**Merci! - Thank you!**

**Excusez-moi?! - Excuse me?!**

**Oh, je ne vous vois pas - Oh, I did not see you**

**No, Antoinette does not represent anyone. Yes, she is an OC/random character. No, this story will not turn into Antoinette x Matthew. Yes, she does contribute to plot development. That's pretty much all I have to say in the matter.**

** _Questions? Criticism? Feel free to review!_**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Wow this story has reached 1,000 views and it's almost to 50 follows, thank you all so much. Ahhhh all of the reviews and follows make me feel super special! You have no idea how much it means to me, especially on my first fanfiction. **

**I had a lot of fun writing this chapter so I hope you enjoy Chapter 7**

* * *

"Bonjour, Matthieu! Bonjour, Alfred!"

"Good morning, Antoinette," Matthew yawned.

"Antoinette? Who is this Antionette?"

"Eh?"

Canada sat up jolt upright, and whipped his head around only to find himself face-to-face with Francis. _Crap_. Matt, you're screwed, Matthew's inner voice commented.

"Ohonhonhonhon, could this Antionette be your _lover_?" Francis smirked and raised his eyebrows suggestively.

Canada, now fully awake, screeched loudly and threw his pillow at France. "France! No! Shut up! It's nothing like that!"

"Awwww, mon petit is in love," gushed the Frenchman. He grabbed the other nation's hands and went frighteningly serious. "If she ever hurts you in any way you can trust me when I say that I will make sure she-"

"Francis!" Matthew wiggled his hands out of Francis's death grip and rested them on the shoulders of the older male. "Antionette is just a girl I met last night. I hardly know her!"

France pouted thoughtfully, "I didn't think you were into those kinds of things Matthieu. I am shocked."

At this, Matthew literally facepalmed and let out a sigh, attempting to control his anger and frustration. He narrowed his pretty blue eyes and, decided to change the subject.

"Why are you here… and how did you get in my hotel room in the first place?"

With a sheepish smile, the Frenchman held up a lockpick. "I did it for a good cause!"

"How the hell is wishing me a "good morning" and then tormenting me about my love life a good cause?" Canada yelled. He was not in the mood for this. It was too early and he still had to sort out his feelings with Prussia. Not only that but Canada had a world meeting full of arguing and being ignored to look forward to. _Don't forget being the designated driver at Francis's party_, Matthew's annoying inner voice added.

"I did it to make sure you were okay!" Francis defended. "Alfred told me about the fall you had a few days ago and I just wanted to confirm you weren't still hurt."

Now Matthew felt bad. _Way to be the villain Matthew. You probably hurt his feelings,_ the inner voice bashed.

"Oh, I-I'm sorry. I'm just…I'm not in the best mood today."

"I can see that."

"Why are you guys being so loud?" Alfred mumbled, half asleep.

"Bonjour Alfred!" Francis said cheerfully.

"'Mornin'"

Suddenly, an alarm went off. After about two minutes of deafening beeping, Alfred located the source of the beeping (his phone) and turned it off with a moan.

"That was announcing that there's two hours until the World Meeting."

"Mon Dieu! I better get going then. See you at the meeting~!" With that, Francis had left and Alfred claimed the shower, leaving Matthew to retrieve breakfast from the buffet on the bottom floor.

* * *

"Il est bon de vous revoir!" Antoinette greeted. Today instead of having her hair in a short ponytail, her dark blonde locks hugged the side of her face and dipped below her chin in a medium bob. A bright blue extension that seemed to be a bit too long stood out on the left side on her hair. Matthew had to say that she looked more like a middle schooler than an adult. Nevertheless, he was pleased to have a human actually notice him.

"Hey Antoinette!" Matthew yawned, still exhausted from running up so many flights of stairs. He attempted to rub the sleep out of his eyes and gave the concierge a half-hearted smile. "Sorry, I'm really tired. Hiking up the stairs yesterday was hell and my...uh," _You can't France is your father, that would be just weird._ "...older brother came in this morning and woke me up."

Antoinette seemed confused for a second, then perked up. "Is he the blonde guy with stubble who was hitting on one of the other receptionists, Dominique? I thought he looked a little bit like you..."

_Wow that's just like him_, "Knowing him, yeah..." Matthew trailed off awkwardly. For some reason this conversation wasn't going as smooth as he had hoped. _I just have to get breakfast, then meet up with Gil, then I can finally learn what's been on his mind._

"Are you okay? You seem pretty upset about something," Antoinette said quietly, looking at Matthew with innocent, brown, doe-eyes. "I didn't do anything, did I?"

"What! No of course not!"

"Then what's bothering you?"

_Oh God, I'm not going to do this._

"It's going to sound really stupid…."

"That's fine! I have an older brother and two older sisters, trust me, I know what _stupide_ is," Antionette grinned. "I want to help you, I won't laugh at your problems."

_Oh my God, I'm seriously going to do this._

Putting his head in his hands, Matthew mentally prepared himself for the jeers and mockery. _Well, telling someone couldn't hurt that bad_. He took a deep, shaky breath. "IthinkIlikethisguy,butI'mnotreallysureifIdoand,Im ean,we'refriendsandIdon'thavemanyfriendsandIdon'tw anttolosehimasafriendbutIdon'twanttojusthidemyfeel ingsandIhad adreamwherehestabbedmeandanotherwherehesaidhedidn' twanttobemyfriendanymore." Matthew paused and took a long breath to sort out his thoughts, the continued, "Ijusthavenoideawhattodoandhewantsmetomeetupwithhi mheresometimeandI'mreallynervousand_ I just don't want to be alone._"

At this point, the Canadian was trying extremely hard to keep his tears back. He was so confused and so dismayed by something so little, in his opinion. Closing his eyes, he took a few more shaky breaths before opening them to see Antoinette's stunned face.

"'Told you it was stupid," Matthew whispered. Despite his attempts, a stray tear fell down the side of his face. He wiped away at it angrily, not wanting Antoinette to see how much he was stressing out about this.

"I'm sorry," Antoinette apologized after she had recovered from her shock. "I was just surprised; you don't really scream 'gay.'"

The Canadian blinked. _That's what she was surprised about?_

Antoinette placed her hands on Matthew's shoulders reassuringly. "Seriously though, if I were you I would be honest with him. If he thinks you're a weirdo you can have Alfred beat him up. But who knows, he might return your feelings."

"B-but what if he doesn't?"

The concierge shrugged, "You will never know until you be honest with him." With these words she wrapped her arms around the Canadian and dragged him into a sweet hug. "Je ne sais pas comment il ne pouvait pas aimer quelqu'un d'aussi doux que vous. Même s'il ne veut pas être votre ami, je serai là pour vous."

Matthew found himself blushing in Antoinette's embrace. He closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around the short girl.

"Merci pour ce conseil," Canada smiled. _Maybe if I follow Antoinette's advice, then everything will work out in the end._

As if to make him blush more, the receptionist kissed Matthew on the cheek and hugged him even tighter with a giggle. Matthew opened his eyes to get a look at the girl's childish smile, but was met with a whole different picture.

"Merde."

Sure enough, there in the doorway of the now fixed elevator stood none other than a slack-jawed Gilbert, who just witnessed something that onlookers could only call a "couple's embrace."

"Merde," Canada repeated, loud enough so only Antoinette could hear. She untangled her arms from Matthew's slim figure, and followed his gaze to the albino guy staring at them like he had just seen the two of them pull out knives and begin to stab each other.

"That's the guy, isn't it," Antoinette whispered in an emotionless voice.

"Yeah, it is."

_Matthew Williams, you sir, are **royally** screwed._

* * *

**Translations (French to English) I apologize if these are wrong, blame Google Translate**

**Bonjour - Hello, Good Morning**

**Mon petit - My little one**

**Mon Dieu- My God**

**Il est bon de vous revoir - It is good to see you.**

**stupide - stupid**

**Je ne sais pas comment il ne pouvait pas aimer quelqu'un d'aussi doux que vous. Même s'il ne veut pas être votre ami, je serai là pour vous. - I do not know how he could not love someone as sweet as you. Even if he does not want to be your friend, I'll be there for you.**

**Merci pour ce conseil - Thank you for this advice.**

**Merde - Crap**

**A/N: Matthew in French is spelled Matthieu. Whenever France or Antoinette say his name it is spelled like that to emphasize their accent because I'm really bad at writing dialects.**

**_Questions? Criticism? Feel free to review or PM me!_**


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